Random Thoughts

Look at this. Two days in a row of posts. Excellent.

So, where have I been since January you may (or may not) be asking yourself? Well, I've been around. I went through a few more bad months, but after some discoveries about my allergy medicine (don't take Zyrtec if you have a tendency towards depression or are currently being treated for it, and if you do, talk to your doctor!) I am beginning to feel on track.

Over the past 4 months or so I spent a lot of time at temple. A lot. Many weeks I was there 5 out of 7 days (Friday-Saturday for Shabbat services, Sunday for Religious School, Monday for a beginning Hebrew class I taught to newly arrived students, and Tuesday for Hebrew School and/or Board Meetings). For the most part it was a good thing to be there so much; I was around people I cared about, I had the support of my community, and it kept me busy and occupied, which was a key thing for me.

But, a couple of weeks before Passover I got a cold. Which turned into a sinus infection. And lingered for a month (though the infection cleared up w/ antibiotics within a week of finally going to the doctor). I was drained. I had no energy. And one weekend, for the first time in ages when I have been in town, I didn't go to temple for services Friday or Saturday. Friday night I went to a friend's house for a lively pot luck and outdoor service. And the next day I decided to take a long drive out into the country. I can't explain it, but those couple of days away from temple were needed. I needed to recharge. I needed to not feel like this was just an obligation, that it was a job to be there. I love my temple, and I needed a little bit of distance to renew that love.

Now the school year is over. My fourth graders ended their first year of Hebrew on a high note and my Monday night class was reading, if haltingly, and learning grammar by our last evening together. It was a good school year, and I am incredibly proud of all of my students. Last year I felt a bit over my head when teaching Hebrew; this year I think I was beginning to hit my stride and I am excited for next year.

Over the last few months I have also read Torah a few times (once for the anniversary of my bat mitzvah, once to fill in for our ailing intern, and once on Passover - the Song of the Sea). I rocked my bat mitzvah portion, did decently with the next one, and after only preparing for 2 days I muddled through reasonably well for the Song of the Sea, which happens to be the hardest portion, or so says my rabbi. I don't know when I will read next, but I am hoping it will be this summer.

Oh, and last, but not least, I passed my 5 year mark since my conversion. It isn't like when your car turns over from 99,000 to 100,000 miles. Maybe it should have been, but it was more like "Hmmm. I've been a Jew for 5 years. That's pretty cool." Somewhere along the way since my conversion I began to truly think of myself as a Jew and not a convert. So, while it was momentous in a way, it is also something I don't feel the need to make a big deal over.