I'm going to combine my personal observations about the Biennial for days 3–5, mostly because Day 4 was Shabbat and was a pretty chill day, and Day 5 included much traveling.
So, Day 3 was an interesting day. It began with prayer and ended with really great Jewish music. I was feeling pretty good and comfortable at the Biennial by the third day, something which I think relieved my rabbi to a certain extent.
I had lunch with a woman I had met in the Shabbat session on Day 2, and it was a nice lunch, getting to hear someone else's story and why they have a commitment to Judaism. She said something interesting during our conversation that sparked off quite a bit of thinking on my part. We were talking about our congregations and rabbis and she mentioned that the rabbi who had basically brought her back into Judaism, had married her, had been such a huge part of her life, fell off her pedestal at the end of her tenure at the temple. It got me thinking a lot about the role of the rabbi and the appropriateness of putting them on another level than ourselves and what that does to both our own view of Judaism and our relationship with the clergy. I was worried that I was in that position, putting my rabbi on a pedestal where he could do no wrong and that one day he would fall off. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized this wasn't the case. I have a close relationship with my rabbi; we're friends, but more than that he is my mentor and my spiritual leader. But I have never once believed he was this perfect person who could do no wrong. I like and respect him not because he is perfect, but because he is imperfect and is able to recognize and acknowledge that himself. He doesn't pretend to be the absolute authority on everything, he doesn't pretend that he is the smartest when it comes to Torah, and he doesn't try to put himself on a separate level from his congregation and students. On more than one occasion he has said something that has either ticked me off or offended me, and I have taken each time as an opportunity to speak up and state why saying what he said upset me. And each time he has listened.
I think we do a disservice to our clergy when we expect them to be perfect, to never say anything wrong, to never do anything wrong, and to be the Jews we can't be ourselves. Their role is to teach and to guide and to help us along our spiritual path, and yes, they are role models, but so are other Jews. We can't put this pressure on our rabbis to be everything Jewish to us at all times. They are men and women who have dedicated their lives to the Jewish people, but they are also men and women. They are still students themselves, constantly learning, from each other and from us. As much as I learn from my rabbi, I know he learns from those of us in the congregation who engage him in discussion and study. Judaism is lifelong learning and it's not something the ends when you have your bat or bar mitzvah, or when you finish religious school, or are confirmed, or even when you are ordained.
I feel like if we are able to see our rabbis as perpetual students, just like ourselves, we won't feel the need to put them on untouchable pedestals, and they won't, in the end, fall off of those pedestals.
----------------------
Shabbat. Before Shabbat even began there was this feeling in the air, a sense of anticipation, of excitement that I've never felt before. As I was sitting in my final workshop of the day on Friday I was overcome with this intense feeling of.... I can't even describe it. It was like my mind and my body were saying "Shabbat is almost here! We're ready!" The exhaustion of the week and knowing that this wonderful evening of prayer and day of rest were coming was overwhelming. It was almost as if I could feel the sun sinking lower in the sky. It was nearly Shabbat and I was ready. And man, what a Shabbat. After 3 incredibly full days of workshops and lectures and meeting people and all of the excitement of Biennial, Shabbat was a welcome respite. I attended a Torah study breakfast with a friend from my temple (I was strictly forbidden to attend my rabbi's, though he said later he wished I had been there because it went really well) and then we joined up with my rabbi and the rest of the people from my congregation for services. I like the services, but again, the large number of people made it less than ideal. It was neat getting to actually sit in the congregation with my rabbi instead of him leading. We were just two Jews praying.
I have to get back to work now, but I'll try and post more about my Shabbat thoughts later.
Showing posts with label biennial 2008. Show all posts
Showing posts with label biennial 2008. Show all posts
1.02.2008
Biennial, Day 3 (content observations part 2)
Workshop #2
Making the Journey from the Gates to the Mishkan
w/ Cantor Chanin Becker-Rosin of Scarsdale Synagogue-Tremont Temple in Scarsdale, NY; Rabbi Edwin Goldberg of Temple Judea in Coral Gables, FL; Diana S. Herman of Temple Emanu-El in Edison, NJ; and Rabbi Sheryl Nosan-Blank of Temple Or Rishon in Orangevale, CA
I was quite eager to attend this workshop as I was recently added to the Ritual Committee at my temple and one of the major things we will be undertaking in coming months is an evaluation of Mishkan T'filah.
So, from my notes:
• it's an opportunity to look at the larger worship picture
• how do you address the differences?
• how do you introduce it appropriately?
• it is important to recognize that we all come w/ our own framework
• do you transition or just jump in and use it?
• offer different opportunities for groups to look at the pages, think and talk through the different options during the service--->get them into the siddur, the prayers, and the thinking
• introduce through chavruta study
• remind people that prayer is about an approach to God, not the book itself
• use familiar melodies to keep people feeling comfortable*
• use niggunim to connect texts
• start out with the linear service option and move to the choices as people become more comfortable with the book
*The example they used was for the morning blessing for the soul (Elohai n'shama....); the cantor (who, by the way, had one of the most striking and rich voices I've ever heard) sang the familiar melody as we either read through the English translation together, then sang along with her, then read the two alternate english readings.
One of the major points brought up is that congregations should probably transition gradually; don't just jump into the new siddur so that you alienate people, but don't resist it just because it is new. I hadn't realized that there were 2 linear services available (Shabbat evening and morning), so I think that will definitely help; the spread format can be difficult to get used to, but after using Mishkan for a number or services at the Biennial I felt quite comfortable with the format. The moderators brought up the point that people will know to turn the page or that the prayer is done because of the final line of Hebrew that comes up (even on the English sections), though I forget the term they used for it.
Someone in the audience asked the question of what do we do with our old siddurim. One of the suggestions was to donate them to a congregation that cannot afford siddurim at all (such as congregations in poor cities/towns/countries, new congregations, etc.). Another suggestion was to contact the families or individuals who purchased a book (or books) and see if they would like them (and also see if they would like to donate to the fund for the new book).
I heard some mumblings from people about how they assumed we'd be getting more concrete ideas about the actual transition, but I thought the dialogue was fairly helpful. And to be honest, I don't think enough congregations have begun using it to have a truly concrete method that will work, in addition to the fact that each congregation is unique.
----------------------
After the workshop I sat and chatted with a new acquaintance from Tennessee whose wife is a first-year student at HUC; I hope to keep in touch with them because he had a lot of interesting things to say, both about Mishkan and Reform practice in general.
----------------------
Friday evening was, of course, Shabbat services at what SRK referred to as "Beit Jumbo-tron." Coming from a congregation of approx. 250 families, I'm not used to ever being at services with more than 500 people (and that's just HHD), so 5000 people was fairly overwhelming. The 4 of use from my temple just followed SRK like little ducklings through the aisles, trying to stay together, finally getting 5 seats together at the end of two rows.
So, the service itself... it was okay. Everyone told me before I left for the Biennial that Shabbat services would just be so powerful and that "hearing 5000 Jews all saying the Shema at the same time will just take your breath away." And yes, it was pretty cool to be praying with a ton of people who truly wanted to be there and weren't there out of some feeling of obligation. But, truth be told, I attend a small temple for a reason. The intimacy of know most, if not all, of the people around me is much more powerful for me than a large hall of people. But, for the most part I thought it was a decent service. The Sh'lichei Tzibur (service leaders) were pretty decent (Rabbi Donald M. Goor of Temple Judea in Tarzana, CA and Cantor John M. Kaplan of Temple Israel in Memphis, TN) and the music was okay. The feel of it was just... off. I think a lot of it has to do with the large screens, which I totally understand the need for since the room was o large and no seats were raised up; for people who need connect visually to the service leader, the screens are a necessity. That said, people should probably learn how to behave with them a little better for services. Anytime people would see themselves on the screen (if the cameras panned out over the congregation) they would point and wave and generally act like they were on the jumbo-tron at the ballgame.
I'll have more comments about actual worship styles with the Shabbat morning post.
Go here for an interesting article about the mega-church feel of Shabbat at the Biennial (and of Reform practice in general). For some good discussion of this article, go here.
---------------------
After services we went to the regional Shabbat dinner; I was a little annoyed because when signing up for the dinner you are asked for food allergies. I have an allergy to most orange foods (it's odd and I don't know really anyone else who has it), probably because of the beta-carotene, but whatever it is I can't eat things like carrots and pumpkin and sweet potatoes. So, I put those allergies down (listing very specific foods, not just "no orange food") and my meal ticket said "Chicken-S," the "s" standing for special. First off, I had to pick the shredded carrots out of my salad. I usually don't like to do this since I seem to always miss some, but I wasn't going to complain because seating wasn't assigned. However, when they were bringing food out they forgot that I needed a special plate and I was given one with a ton of cooked carrots mixed in with the other veggies. I pointed out to my server that my "special" was b/c of an allergy to carrots. So, they took the plate away and then took 20 minutes to bring me a new one, during which time everyone else at my table finished their meals and SRK decided to move things along a bit with the servers; they claimed they need to go all the way back to the kitchen for it, which is why it took so long. However, when they did bring me something, it was the exact same meal, with about 3 fewer carrots. I just didn't eat any vegetables that night because I had a feeling if I didn't take that plate I'd get to eat dinner as everyone else began benching.
My frustration is on 2 levels here: if you are going to ask about food allergies you should actually use the information. Secondly, my food allergy, while not so severe that I was going to have my airway close up just by being in the presence of a carrot, is still an allergy that makes me quite uncomfortable but was obviously not taken seriously by those in charge of the food. Had my allergy been to nuts I can assure you that I would not have received a plate in the first place with the allergy-causing substance on it, and certainly not if I had pointed it out. I have a feeling they were just assuming that I didn't like carrots (which isn't true; I love carrots and hate the fact that I can't eat them).
----------------------
After dinner was the Shabbat Song Session, which was pretty awesome. Lots of great singing and lots of energy. Then we headed up to hear the Michelle Citrin and the Josh Nelson Project, both of who were amazing. I highly recommend checking out their music.
Then it was back to the hotel and collapsing into bed.
Making the Journey from the Gates to the Mishkan
w/ Cantor Chanin Becker-Rosin of Scarsdale Synagogue-Tremont Temple in Scarsdale, NY; Rabbi Edwin Goldberg of Temple Judea in Coral Gables, FL; Diana S. Herman of Temple Emanu-El in Edison, NJ; and Rabbi Sheryl Nosan-Blank of Temple Or Rishon in Orangevale, CA
I was quite eager to attend this workshop as I was recently added to the Ritual Committee at my temple and one of the major things we will be undertaking in coming months is an evaluation of Mishkan T'filah.
So, from my notes:
• it's an opportunity to look at the larger worship picture
• how do you address the differences?
• how do you introduce it appropriately?
• it is important to recognize that we all come w/ our own framework
• do you transition or just jump in and use it?
• offer different opportunities for groups to look at the pages, think and talk through the different options during the service--->get them into the siddur, the prayers, and the thinking
• introduce through chavruta study
• remind people that prayer is about an approach to God, not the book itself
• use familiar melodies to keep people feeling comfortable*
• use niggunim to connect texts
• start out with the linear service option and move to the choices as people become more comfortable with the book
*The example they used was for the morning blessing for the soul (Elohai n'shama....); the cantor (who, by the way, had one of the most striking and rich voices I've ever heard) sang the familiar melody as we either read through the English translation together, then sang along with her, then read the two alternate english readings.
One of the major points brought up is that congregations should probably transition gradually; don't just jump into the new siddur so that you alienate people, but don't resist it just because it is new. I hadn't realized that there were 2 linear services available (Shabbat evening and morning), so I think that will definitely help; the spread format can be difficult to get used to, but after using Mishkan for a number or services at the Biennial I felt quite comfortable with the format. The moderators brought up the point that people will know to turn the page or that the prayer is done because of the final line of Hebrew that comes up (even on the English sections), though I forget the term they used for it.
Someone in the audience asked the question of what do we do with our old siddurim. One of the suggestions was to donate them to a congregation that cannot afford siddurim at all (such as congregations in poor cities/towns/countries, new congregations, etc.). Another suggestion was to contact the families or individuals who purchased a book (or books) and see if they would like them (and also see if they would like to donate to the fund for the new book).
I heard some mumblings from people about how they assumed we'd be getting more concrete ideas about the actual transition, but I thought the dialogue was fairly helpful. And to be honest, I don't think enough congregations have begun using it to have a truly concrete method that will work, in addition to the fact that each congregation is unique.
----------------------
After the workshop I sat and chatted with a new acquaintance from Tennessee whose wife is a first-year student at HUC; I hope to keep in touch with them because he had a lot of interesting things to say, both about Mishkan and Reform practice in general.
----------------------
Friday evening was, of course, Shabbat services at what SRK referred to as "Beit Jumbo-tron." Coming from a congregation of approx. 250 families, I'm not used to ever being at services with more than 500 people (and that's just HHD), so 5000 people was fairly overwhelming. The 4 of use from my temple just followed SRK like little ducklings through the aisles, trying to stay together, finally getting 5 seats together at the end of two rows.
So, the service itself... it was okay. Everyone told me before I left for the Biennial that Shabbat services would just be so powerful and that "hearing 5000 Jews all saying the Shema at the same time will just take your breath away." And yes, it was pretty cool to be praying with a ton of people who truly wanted to be there and weren't there out of some feeling of obligation. But, truth be told, I attend a small temple for a reason. The intimacy of know most, if not all, of the people around me is much more powerful for me than a large hall of people. But, for the most part I thought it was a decent service. The Sh'lichei Tzibur (service leaders) were pretty decent (Rabbi Donald M. Goor of Temple Judea in Tarzana, CA and Cantor John M. Kaplan of Temple Israel in Memphis, TN) and the music was okay. The feel of it was just... off. I think a lot of it has to do with the large screens, which I totally understand the need for since the room was o large and no seats were raised up; for people who need connect visually to the service leader, the screens are a necessity. That said, people should probably learn how to behave with them a little better for services. Anytime people would see themselves on the screen (if the cameras panned out over the congregation) they would point and wave and generally act like they were on the jumbo-tron at the ballgame.
I'll have more comments about actual worship styles with the Shabbat morning post.
Go here for an interesting article about the mega-church feel of Shabbat at the Biennial (and of Reform practice in general). For some good discussion of this article, go here.
---------------------
After services we went to the regional Shabbat dinner; I was a little annoyed because when signing up for the dinner you are asked for food allergies. I have an allergy to most orange foods (it's odd and I don't know really anyone else who has it), probably because of the beta-carotene, but whatever it is I can't eat things like carrots and pumpkin and sweet potatoes. So, I put those allergies down (listing very specific foods, not just "no orange food") and my meal ticket said "Chicken-S," the "s" standing for special. First off, I had to pick the shredded carrots out of my salad. I usually don't like to do this since I seem to always miss some, but I wasn't going to complain because seating wasn't assigned. However, when they were bringing food out they forgot that I needed a special plate and I was given one with a ton of cooked carrots mixed in with the other veggies. I pointed out to my server that my "special" was b/c of an allergy to carrots. So, they took the plate away and then took 20 minutes to bring me a new one, during which time everyone else at my table finished their meals and SRK decided to move things along a bit with the servers; they claimed they need to go all the way back to the kitchen for it, which is why it took so long. However, when they did bring me something, it was the exact same meal, with about 3 fewer carrots. I just didn't eat any vegetables that night because I had a feeling if I didn't take that plate I'd get to eat dinner as everyone else began benching.
My frustration is on 2 levels here: if you are going to ask about food allergies you should actually use the information. Secondly, my food allergy, while not so severe that I was going to have my airway close up just by being in the presence of a carrot, is still an allergy that makes me quite uncomfortable but was obviously not taken seriously by those in charge of the food. Had my allergy been to nuts I can assure you that I would not have received a plate in the first place with the allergy-causing substance on it, and certainly not if I had pointed it out. I have a feeling they were just assuming that I didn't like carrots (which isn't true; I love carrots and hate the fact that I can't eat them).
----------------------
After dinner was the Shabbat Song Session, which was pretty awesome. Lots of great singing and lots of energy. Then we headed up to hear the Michelle Citrin and the Josh Nelson Project, both of who were amazing. I highly recommend checking out their music.
Then it was back to the hotel and collapsing into bed.
12.27.2007
Biennial, Day 3 (content observations part 1)
Day 3 at the Biennial began w/ services outdoors ("God is in This Place..." Finding God and Ourselves Outside the Sanctuary led by Rabbi Daniel Gottlieb of Kol Ami in Thornhill, ON, and Cantor Micah Floryn Morgovsky of North Country Reform Temple-Ner Tamid in Glen Cove, NY. I did not get as much energy from it as I had the day before with the singing service, but it was okay. It was a little too chilly to be outside, but the sky was spectacular and the sunrise was beautiful. The tenor of the service itself did not really suit my particular preferences, having one cantor with a voice that was good but show-y, and awkward congregant participation. I would also like to point out that I need to figure out how I feel about the silent Amidah repetition. In my home temple we do not do this, so whenever I am in a service where it is customary I feel somewhat awkward with my prayer. I think part of it is the time allotted does not seem to really give people a chance to go through the prayers fully or with any kind of consciousness. Every time I have encountered the silent Amidah it has been stated that when you are done you should sit down. I get very distracted by this, seeing other people finishing, wanting to hurry along myself. I have never been able to fully connect to praying this way any time I've done it.
On another point: while the title of the service suggested that we were leaving behind the sanctuary, in my opinion, we did not. Yes, we were outside instead of in, so there were no walls or ceiling. But, there were still chairs lined up in sections and rows, there was still a microphone and podium. It felt no different in many ways than being in doors. While the sunrise and the sky were gorgeous, I did not feel like we were really leaving a traditional sanctuary setting. If we had gone down to the water or onto a beach, perhaps it would have felt more removed from the traditional setting. Or if they had taken away the chairs. I don't know, but after attending the workshop the day before about finding spirituality in nature, I expected more. This was simply a change of location, not a change of setting, if that makes any sense.
(A sidenote: there were usually 4 morning services to choose from, including one focused on meditation, one on yoga, one for women, one for men, one all in Hebrew, etc.)
-----------------------
Workshop #1
Think Globally, Act Locally: Dialoguing with Christians and Muslims about Israel
w/ Rabbi Meir Azari, Rabbi Paul Golomb, Ethan Felson, and Rabbi Peter Knobel
I really enjoyed this workshop despite being a row directly in front of a bunch of NFTY kids who were obnoxious and loud and rude the entire time (though I did, at one point, turn around and say "you might not be here to listen and learn, but the rest of us are, so BE QUIET").
From my notes:
• "Clergy are the necessary evil in dialogue."
• When we engage in dialogue w/ Christians we use Christian terminology/language (ie. the 10 "Commandments" being displayed in government space)
• We need to express our commonalities, but more importantly we must get to our differences to come to grips with them!
• The Holy Land: what do we mean by this? What is holy? (Torah, people, Shabbat)
---Torah: we stay far, physically from it, only use it w/ strict rules
---Shabbat: we rest, we do what we don't do the rest of the week
---Holiness is that which is antithetical to the norm
• The idea of what the "Holy" in "Holy Land" means for each group MUST be discussed.
• In what way is Jerusalem holy? It can't be assigned in the same was we usually assign the word holy.
• The use of "Holy Land" by evangelicals and protestants is very different than how we think of the word holy (I wish I had more on this, but I think at some point I stopped writing so I could just listen).
One of the major things brought up was the fact that we cannot discuss Israel w/o discussing Zionism and we need to go into the conversation w/ Muslims not expecting to change their minds about Zionism. One of the rabbis was from Israel and he really brought home exactly why we must have conversations with people about Israel, and why we must be committed to it even if we disagree with some policies.
On another point: while the title of the service suggested that we were leaving behind the sanctuary, in my opinion, we did not. Yes, we were outside instead of in, so there were no walls or ceiling. But, there were still chairs lined up in sections and rows, there was still a microphone and podium. It felt no different in many ways than being in doors. While the sunrise and the sky were gorgeous, I did not feel like we were really leaving a traditional sanctuary setting. If we had gone down to the water or onto a beach, perhaps it would have felt more removed from the traditional setting. Or if they had taken away the chairs. I don't know, but after attending the workshop the day before about finding spirituality in nature, I expected more. This was simply a change of location, not a change of setting, if that makes any sense.
(A sidenote: there were usually 4 morning services to choose from, including one focused on meditation, one on yoga, one for women, one for men, one all in Hebrew, etc.)
-----------------------
Workshop #1
Think Globally, Act Locally: Dialoguing with Christians and Muslims about Israel
w/ Rabbi Meir Azari, Rabbi Paul Golomb, Ethan Felson, and Rabbi Peter Knobel
I really enjoyed this workshop despite being a row directly in front of a bunch of NFTY kids who were obnoxious and loud and rude the entire time (though I did, at one point, turn around and say "you might not be here to listen and learn, but the rest of us are, so BE QUIET").
From my notes:
• "Clergy are the necessary evil in dialogue."
• When we engage in dialogue w/ Christians we use Christian terminology/language (ie. the 10 "Commandments" being displayed in government space)
• We need to express our commonalities, but more importantly we must get to our differences to come to grips with them!
• The Holy Land: what do we mean by this? What is holy? (Torah, people, Shabbat)
---Torah: we stay far, physically from it, only use it w/ strict rules
---Shabbat: we rest, we do what we don't do the rest of the week
---Holiness is that which is antithetical to the norm
• The idea of what the "Holy" in "Holy Land" means for each group MUST be discussed.
• In what way is Jerusalem holy? It can't be assigned in the same was we usually assign the word holy.
• The use of "Holy Land" by evangelicals and protestants is very different than how we think of the word holy (I wish I had more on this, but I think at some point I stopped writing so I could just listen).
One of the major things brought up was the fact that we cannot discuss Israel w/o discussing Zionism and we need to go into the conversation w/ Muslims not expecting to change their minds about Zionism. One of the rabbis was from Israel and he really brought home exactly why we must have conversations with people about Israel, and why we must be committed to it even if we disagree with some policies.
Biennial, Day 2 (personal observations)
So, my 2nd day at the Biennial was definitely better than the first. As I said in the earlier post, I began the day at services, and that was by far the best way to begin the day. I felt energized and ready to go and learn.
My fellow congregants at the Biennial and I went out for lunch with our rabbi and had an excellent time. It was a beautiful day (ah, San Diego weather), so we sat outside at a really good seafood/steak place. I've decided to attempt a kosher diet come the secular new year, beginning with cutting out pork and shellfish, so I figured that since I was in a coastal city I would have some good seafood while I still could. I had a bowl of clam clam chowder and some crab thing and my rabbi's comment was "wow, you have a bowl of treif next to a plate of treif." Ha ha ha. I pointed out to him last week what I'm doing, which he respects, so that's fine. It was amusing though. I did, however, take my kippah off while we ate. While I wear it all the time I do take it off if I am doing something totally non-kosher (like eating pork or shellfish).
I will say this about wearing my kippah at the Biennial: it was awesome to see so many other people, and especially women, wearing them the entire time. I don't imagine that everyone who had a kippah on during those 5 days wears one on a daily basis in their home life, but it was great none-the-less. I even purchased a brand-new Bucharian-style kippah that I normally would not have spent as much money on. But, I justified it b/c it is a) beautiful, b) something I will wear often, and c) cheaper than a new tallit. The number of amazingly lovely tallitot in the vendor hall was ridiculous. I like the tallit I have, it is just white w/ blue stripes, but it is my first and it is special to me. But there were a few that were tempting had they not been way too far out of my price range. So, the kippah and a breast cancer pin in the shape of a chai were my only purchases; I even resisted the book and music store. I was there on a budget and I really tried to stick to it. Considering my congregation helped me out financially, I also couldn't justify spending any more money (even though I didn't have it anyway).
I didn't take into account just how exhausting a convention can be, but by the end of the day of workshops and classes I was tuckered out. I wish I had taken the time to go to the ma'ariv minyan, but I decided instead to head back to the hotel room and take a shower before meeting my temple friends for dinner, which itself was a raucous good time.
I also stopped by the 20/30s reception, which was well-attended and where I met 2 people who went to my college (Oberlin grads can find each other anywhere); and then a quick stop at the GLBT gathering, which was not well-attended, though I did meet a very nice rabbi for a congregation in Florida. I was kind of annoyed at the GLBT reception; it was totally shoved to the very end of the convention center, as if we needed to be hidden away. I mentioned this to the rabbi I met and he said it was because of privacy issues and people not being out, especially rabbis and cantors. I can understand this to an extent, but if we continue to perpetuate the idea that being queer is something that has to be on the fringes we'll never be able to be completely out and in the open. Yes, the Reform movement is very welcoming to queer Jews; yes, we are, as a movement, very committed to equality for all genders and sexual orientations. So don't shove us in a corner at the Biennial! Don't say one thing and do another.
My fellow congregants at the Biennial and I went out for lunch with our rabbi and had an excellent time. It was a beautiful day (ah, San Diego weather), so we sat outside at a really good seafood/steak place. I've decided to attempt a kosher diet come the secular new year, beginning with cutting out pork and shellfish, so I figured that since I was in a coastal city I would have some good seafood while I still could. I had a bowl of clam clam chowder and some crab thing and my rabbi's comment was "wow, you have a bowl of treif next to a plate of treif." Ha ha ha. I pointed out to him last week what I'm doing, which he respects, so that's fine. It was amusing though. I did, however, take my kippah off while we ate. While I wear it all the time I do take it off if I am doing something totally non-kosher (like eating pork or shellfish).
I will say this about wearing my kippah at the Biennial: it was awesome to see so many other people, and especially women, wearing them the entire time. I don't imagine that everyone who had a kippah on during those 5 days wears one on a daily basis in their home life, but it was great none-the-less. I even purchased a brand-new Bucharian-style kippah that I normally would not have spent as much money on. But, I justified it b/c it is a) beautiful, b) something I will wear often, and c) cheaper than a new tallit. The number of amazingly lovely tallitot in the vendor hall was ridiculous. I like the tallit I have, it is just white w/ blue stripes, but it is my first and it is special to me. But there were a few that were tempting had they not been way too far out of my price range. So, the kippah and a breast cancer pin in the shape of a chai were my only purchases; I even resisted the book and music store. I was there on a budget and I really tried to stick to it. Considering my congregation helped me out financially, I also couldn't justify spending any more money (even though I didn't have it anyway).
I didn't take into account just how exhausting a convention can be, but by the end of the day of workshops and classes I was tuckered out. I wish I had taken the time to go to the ma'ariv minyan, but I decided instead to head back to the hotel room and take a shower before meeting my temple friends for dinner, which itself was a raucous good time.
I also stopped by the 20/30s reception, which was well-attended and where I met 2 people who went to my college (Oberlin grads can find each other anywhere); and then a quick stop at the GLBT gathering, which was not well-attended, though I did meet a very nice rabbi for a congregation in Florida. I was kind of annoyed at the GLBT reception; it was totally shoved to the very end of the convention center, as if we needed to be hidden away. I mentioned this to the rabbi I met and he said it was because of privacy issues and people not being out, especially rabbis and cantors. I can understand this to an extent, but if we continue to perpetuate the idea that being queer is something that has to be on the fringes we'll never be able to be completely out and in the open. Yes, the Reform movement is very welcoming to queer Jews; yes, we are, as a movement, very committed to equality for all genders and sexual orientations. So don't shove us in a corner at the Biennial! Don't say one thing and do another.
12.26.2007
Biennial, Day 2 (content observations)
I began my 2nd day in San Diego at Shiru L'Adonai, a service in song. It was lead by Rabbi Ethan Franzel from Main Line Reform Temple Beth Elohim in Wynnewood, PA, and Cantor Kay Greenwald from Congregation Beth Am in Los Altos, CA. It was a spectacular way to begin my day and is one of the most moving services I have ever participated in. There is something about singing that makes me feel so much more connected to God, to my spirituality, and to the people around me. It was truly excellent and invigorating. I felt so much better about going into the day and into the workshops than I had on Wednesday. It helped that I got some sleep (and oh, the beds in the hotel were great) and just felt much more human than I had the day before.
Some general observations:
• I can apparently catch onto melodies fairly fast when hearing them for the first time.
• The ratio of tallit- and kippot-wearers is much higher to non-wearers than I have ever seen outside a Conservative or Traditional shul.
• I really enjoyed using Mishkan T'Filah (more on this later), despite some previous troubles with the draft copies in other congregations I've visited.
• I was sitting with a rabbinic student I know and during Hakafa I did not move towards the aisles to kiss the Torah and declined the offer of her tzitzit saying that "I'm a student of SRK's," though it does go deeper than that (also more on this later). She thought that was amusing.
• I seem to be in the minority of people at the Biennial who does not bow during Barechu or the Amidah; I bow only during Aleinu when it literally says "we bow."
• I'm getting used to hearing Torah chanted, though I still like the read-and-translate tradition of my own congregation.
I cannot overstate the positive nature of the service and how much I loved beginning my day that way. As I was putting away my tallit, I turned to the rabbinic student next to me and said "this is why it would be great to have a daily Reform minyan in my city." I really would love to get one going, somehow.
After services I was meeting the 3 women from my congregation who were attending the WRJ part of the Biennial. We sat and listened to Rabbi Daniel Freelander and MK Menachem Ben-Sasson speak about Israel and its importance, which was very interesting. Then after a quick call to SRK to plan lunch, it was off to my first workshop of the day.
----------------------------------
Workshop #1
Reform Reforms Shabbat w/ Rabbi Deborah Bronstein from Congregation Har Hashem in Boulder, CO; Art Grand from Temple Or Rishon in Orangevale, CA; and Iris Petroff from Temple Society of Concord in Syracuse, NY.
This was a great workshop. I am very interesting in moving towards a more observant Shabbat, even if it isn't in the traditional sense of observance. We heard a lot about what each of the panelists have done to increase both their personal Shabbat observances and those of their families and/or fellow congregants.
From my notes:
• Shabbat is like entering the color section of the Wizard of Oz, but we have to know how to enter.
• Add a new ritual each year.
• There are moments in our lives when a commandment (mitzvah) suddenly addresses us.
• Find some way to make the day different.
• Finding the discipline---not seeing Shabbat as part of the list you need to put off
• Congregations helping everyone who wants to attend a Shabbat dinner does
• Dinner & Davening: have pre-Shabbat dinners (at Temple or not) that are not religious-school based
• Shabbat is about re-juvenation, re-creating, and re-connecting
• Have conversion candidates commit to keeping Shabbat in some way during the year(s) that they are studying. Helps instill a sense of connection to the day and observance that they did not grow up with, were never commanded to do before.
• Put a table cloth on the table, a sheet over the TV or desk
• Have a specific food that becomes your "taste of Shabbat."
• Cineplex?
My thoughts wandered a little bit during the session to what we can do at my congregation to get more people to attend Torah study and services on Saturday morning.
• have Torah studies led by lay people and/or groups (such as Sisterhood) more frequently
• have a "Saturday Morning Live" program where we have good music that draws people in (not just a guitarist for Tot Shabbat)
• read Torah on Friday night once a month to give people a taste of what we have on Saturday morning, a connection to the Torah that they are not getting.
I was very interested in Rabbi Yoffie's Shabbat morning sermon as much of it had to do with ways to reinvigorate Shabbat in our congregations. I hope to have some conversations with my rabbi and other members of my congregation about Shabbat and how we can make it better at our temple.
In general I felt like I had some new ideas for how I can personally begin to observe Shabbat more. As it is I attend services on Friday night and Saturday morning, but beyond that I think it is difficult for those of us who are single adults with no Jewish family as so much of Shabbat observance seems to be centered around the home and the family. So, perhaps I will need to become more creative with what is a meaningful Shabbat observance for me. Plenty to chew on, to be sure.
------------------------
After lunch I attended a forum titled What's Spirituality Got to Do With It: Ritual, Worship and Mysticism. The panelists were Rabbi Zoe Klein, Rabbi Lawrence Kushner, and Rabbi Arnold J. Wolf. It was a very interesting panel that I wish I could have gotten a little more out of, but as I had a massive headache for a good portion of it, I wasn't as focused as I would have liked to be.
From my notes:
• Are we afraid of holy moments? Rabbi Klein says that rabbis are especially afraid of holy moments (making jokes, etc.).
• Is the seeking of holy moments a kabbalistic idea? Why not just a Jewish idea?
• Love=reverence for mystery
• to be in awe of what is hidden beneath the veil is to be mystified
• Why are we now so attracted to spirituality?
• spirituality is soaring above the politics and every day bits of religion
• God is found in the details (Rabbi Wolf)? Isn't God also found in significant moments? Why not both?**
• Rabbi Wolf claims that spiritual seekers don't understand the nitty gritty of everyday religion (which is what he would prefer); I don't agree with this. As someone who is a spiritual seeker and who sees the beauty of religion I feel you can be both.
**My response a few days later:
What defines a "big" or "significant" moment? If we find God in the small details, does that not elevate the moment to significance? How actively can we pursue significant encounters with God? Is it possible to try too hard? Is it possible to miss the significant moment happening even as we are looking for it? What happens when we miss too many encounters with God?
I truly believe that I find God in so many different moments that there is no way I can even be aware of each one, but I don't think that's a bad thing. I think that on some level I am aware and it helps me in those moments when I am truly in need of God's presence. I think that even when I am not aware, God is.
--------------
Workshop #2
Spiritual Pathways Through Nature with Rabbi Michael Comins of Torah Trek.
The notes I took were sketchy, so I don't have a lot to write below, but I enjoyed the workshop. I'm not personally very into meditation, but I do love to experience God in nature and in the beauty of natural things. I find my breath taken away sometimes when I look at a summer sky full of luscious clouds and can't help feeling that God connection.
He taught us a couple of ways that he helps people connect to their Judaism on the trails, much of it having to do with breathing and mindfulness, being aware of what is going on around you, and at that moment bringing a prayer into the mix, be it a traditional Jewish prayer, or one that is from your heart.
Rabbi Comins spoke about finding God in nature, finding a sanctuary that does not have walls, and how we are able to us Jewish prayer to feel more connected to the natural.
He spoke a lot about I-Thou receptiveness=mindfulness. In I-Thou you take in the whole and you respect and there is a moral dimension---whatever the "thou" requires is what you require of yourself.
Mystical connection:
• you feel the light of God, the energy of God in nature
• make yourself like an empty vessel so that God may fill it up
• being mindful means you are making room for God and a spiritual moment
• we are less likely to have a God-experience when we go right into the book (siddur); using music takes us back to the right side of the brain, the emotional side; better for mindfulness--we can use this by way of chanting in nature
• but can we also bring mindfulness and these techniques into the synagogue?
------------------
So, that was the main content of Day 2. I'll post more personal observations in different post, including what I did in the evening. The 2nd day was definitely a good day.
Some general observations:
• I can apparently catch onto melodies fairly fast when hearing them for the first time.
• The ratio of tallit- and kippot-wearers is much higher to non-wearers than I have ever seen outside a Conservative or Traditional shul.
• I really enjoyed using Mishkan T'Filah (more on this later), despite some previous troubles with the draft copies in other congregations I've visited.
• I was sitting with a rabbinic student I know and during Hakafa I did not move towards the aisles to kiss the Torah and declined the offer of her tzitzit saying that "I'm a student of SRK's," though it does go deeper than that (also more on this later). She thought that was amusing.
• I seem to be in the minority of people at the Biennial who does not bow during Barechu or the Amidah; I bow only during Aleinu when it literally says "we bow."
• I'm getting used to hearing Torah chanted, though I still like the read-and-translate tradition of my own congregation.
I cannot overstate the positive nature of the service and how much I loved beginning my day that way. As I was putting away my tallit, I turned to the rabbinic student next to me and said "this is why it would be great to have a daily Reform minyan in my city." I really would love to get one going, somehow.
After services I was meeting the 3 women from my congregation who were attending the WRJ part of the Biennial. We sat and listened to Rabbi Daniel Freelander and MK Menachem Ben-Sasson speak about Israel and its importance, which was very interesting. Then after a quick call to SRK to plan lunch, it was off to my first workshop of the day.
----------------------------------
Workshop #1
Reform Reforms Shabbat w/ Rabbi Deborah Bronstein from Congregation Har Hashem in Boulder, CO; Art Grand from Temple Or Rishon in Orangevale, CA; and Iris Petroff from Temple Society of Concord in Syracuse, NY.
This was a great workshop. I am very interesting in moving towards a more observant Shabbat, even if it isn't in the traditional sense of observance. We heard a lot about what each of the panelists have done to increase both their personal Shabbat observances and those of their families and/or fellow congregants.
From my notes:
• Shabbat is like entering the color section of the Wizard of Oz, but we have to know how to enter.
• Add a new ritual each year.
• There are moments in our lives when a commandment (mitzvah) suddenly addresses us.
• Find some way to make the day different.
• Finding the discipline---not seeing Shabbat as part of the list you need to put off
• Congregations helping everyone who wants to attend a Shabbat dinner does
• Dinner & Davening: have pre-Shabbat dinners (at Temple or not) that are not religious-school based
• Shabbat is about re-juvenation, re-creating, and re-connecting
• Have conversion candidates commit to keeping Shabbat in some way during the year(s) that they are studying. Helps instill a sense of connection to the day and observance that they did not grow up with, were never commanded to do before.
• Put a table cloth on the table, a sheet over the TV or desk
• Have a specific food that becomes your "taste of Shabbat."
• Cineplex?
My thoughts wandered a little bit during the session to what we can do at my congregation to get more people to attend Torah study and services on Saturday morning.
• have Torah studies led by lay people and/or groups (such as Sisterhood) more frequently
• have a "Saturday Morning Live" program where we have good music that draws people in (not just a guitarist for Tot Shabbat)
• read Torah on Friday night once a month to give people a taste of what we have on Saturday morning, a connection to the Torah that they are not getting.
I was very interested in Rabbi Yoffie's Shabbat morning sermon as much of it had to do with ways to reinvigorate Shabbat in our congregations. I hope to have some conversations with my rabbi and other members of my congregation about Shabbat and how we can make it better at our temple.
In general I felt like I had some new ideas for how I can personally begin to observe Shabbat more. As it is I attend services on Friday night and Saturday morning, but beyond that I think it is difficult for those of us who are single adults with no Jewish family as so much of Shabbat observance seems to be centered around the home and the family. So, perhaps I will need to become more creative with what is a meaningful Shabbat observance for me. Plenty to chew on, to be sure.
------------------------
After lunch I attended a forum titled What's Spirituality Got to Do With It: Ritual, Worship and Mysticism. The panelists were Rabbi Zoe Klein, Rabbi Lawrence Kushner, and Rabbi Arnold J. Wolf. It was a very interesting panel that I wish I could have gotten a little more out of, but as I had a massive headache for a good portion of it, I wasn't as focused as I would have liked to be.
From my notes:
• Are we afraid of holy moments? Rabbi Klein says that rabbis are especially afraid of holy moments (making jokes, etc.).
• Is the seeking of holy moments a kabbalistic idea? Why not just a Jewish idea?
• Love=reverence for mystery
• to be in awe of what is hidden beneath the veil is to be mystified
• Why are we now so attracted to spirituality?
• spirituality is soaring above the politics and every day bits of religion
• God is found in the details (Rabbi Wolf)? Isn't God also found in significant moments? Why not both?**
• Rabbi Wolf claims that spiritual seekers don't understand the nitty gritty of everyday religion (which is what he would prefer); I don't agree with this. As someone who is a spiritual seeker and who sees the beauty of religion I feel you can be both.
**My response a few days later:
What defines a "big" or "significant" moment? If we find God in the small details, does that not elevate the moment to significance? How actively can we pursue significant encounters with God? Is it possible to try too hard? Is it possible to miss the significant moment happening even as we are looking for it? What happens when we miss too many encounters with God?
I truly believe that I find God in so many different moments that there is no way I can even be aware of each one, but I don't think that's a bad thing. I think that on some level I am aware and it helps me in those moments when I am truly in need of God's presence. I think that even when I am not aware, God is.
--------------
Workshop #2
Spiritual Pathways Through Nature with Rabbi Michael Comins of Torah Trek.
The notes I took were sketchy, so I don't have a lot to write below, but I enjoyed the workshop. I'm not personally very into meditation, but I do love to experience God in nature and in the beauty of natural things. I find my breath taken away sometimes when I look at a summer sky full of luscious clouds and can't help feeling that God connection.
He taught us a couple of ways that he helps people connect to their Judaism on the trails, much of it having to do with breathing and mindfulness, being aware of what is going on around you, and at that moment bringing a prayer into the mix, be it a traditional Jewish prayer, or one that is from your heart.
Rabbi Comins spoke about finding God in nature, finding a sanctuary that does not have walls, and how we are able to us Jewish prayer to feel more connected to the natural.
He spoke a lot about I-Thou receptiveness=mindfulness. In I-Thou you take in the whole and you respect and there is a moral dimension---whatever the "thou" requires is what you require of yourself.
Mystical connection:
• you feel the light of God, the energy of God in nature
• make yourself like an empty vessel so that God may fill it up
• being mindful means you are making room for God and a spiritual moment
• we are less likely to have a God-experience when we go right into the book (siddur); using music takes us back to the right side of the brain, the emotional side; better for mindfulness--we can use this by way of chanting in nature
• but can we also bring mindfulness and these techniques into the synagogue?
------------------
So, that was the main content of Day 2. I'll post more personal observations in different post, including what I did in the evening. The 2nd day was definitely a good day.
12.20.2007
Biennial, Day 1 (content observations)
The first session I attended at the Biennial was Marketing for Small Congregations. Despite being 45 minutes late, I think I got a lot out of it.
Newsletters:
--try and use them as learning tools (ie. history, Torah, holidays, etc)
--have youth group students write a column
--have regular congregants write a column
--have a pull-out calendar that people can post on their fridge or bulletin board
Websites:
--make sure the first page has the service times displayed in prominent place
--make it easy to find contact information for the president, rabbi, administrator, educator, etc.
--make sure that if people are e-mailing those people they will get prompt responses
--have a link for people interested in joining
--links for people interested in conversion where some basic questions can be answered
--give detailed information about upcoming programs and services
--don't have large areas of text people need to scroll through and read on the first page; if you want to post sermons or columns, link to them or provide downloadable PDFs
--don't have music automatically begin playing when you enter the site
--have clear navigation bars
--update regularly!
--make sure the look reflects the other materials the temple uses (stationary, logo, colors)
--if you have pictures, make sure there are pictures of the sanctuary w/ people in it, of the temple with doors open, of a good cross-section of the congregation
I think they also talked about having a logo and colors, and a "brand," but I feel like we already have that, so I wasn't worried about missing it.
--------------------------------
The 2nd workshop I went to was on Outreach Programs (I forget the actual title). I'm not currently on the outreach committee, but I though there would be some good ideas to that I could share, and there were. I was most interested in the one about attracting people in their 20s and 30s to join.
--stop calling due "dues" and members "members." Call them "support" and "partners. Don't make belonging to a temple like belonging to a gym or swim club (b/c those are places that hope that you don't really used them once you've joined; we want you to come to shul once you are a member).
--don't just provide social opportunities for young people to get involved; do something that includes a service opportunity and community support
--have reduced or no dues for the first year and reduced up to a certain age, but try to instill in them the value of supporting the temple financially so that when they can, they will.*
--do a program where you provide free or reduced membership for the first 6 months; get people in the door so they can see what goes on
--do new member classes (such as who are the committees, the board, the administrator, etc.) along with mixers where new members can meet current members
--make sure you do a new member survey after the first year; find out what worked for them, what didn't
--make it a priority that the rabbi and president contact each new member/family at least once over the course of the first year.
I have more notes at home, so I'll add to this later. But I felt like this gave me a lot of ideas about outreach.
*I think it is a common misperception that young people don't understand the value of supporting their temple financially; for a lot of people my age (20s–30s) I think they realize that they would be doing something good and valuable, but when you don't make a lot of money you have to make sacrifices and choices as to what you can support, and for many it probably comes down to being able to pay bills or joining a temple. I can say for certain that despite having a decent paying job it is still a bit of a struggle to pay my dues each year, especially as I am trying to save money at the same time for the future.
Newsletters:
--try and use them as learning tools (ie. history, Torah, holidays, etc)
--have youth group students write a column
--have regular congregants write a column
--have a pull-out calendar that people can post on their fridge or bulletin board
Websites:
--make sure the first page has the service times displayed in prominent place
--make it easy to find contact information for the president, rabbi, administrator, educator, etc.
--make sure that if people are e-mailing those people they will get prompt responses
--have a link for people interested in joining
--links for people interested in conversion where some basic questions can be answered
--give detailed information about upcoming programs and services
--don't have large areas of text people need to scroll through and read on the first page; if you want to post sermons or columns, link to them or provide downloadable PDFs
--don't have music automatically begin playing when you enter the site
--have clear navigation bars
--update regularly!
--make sure the look reflects the other materials the temple uses (stationary, logo, colors)
--if you have pictures, make sure there are pictures of the sanctuary w/ people in it, of the temple with doors open, of a good cross-section of the congregation
I think they also talked about having a logo and colors, and a "brand," but I feel like we already have that, so I wasn't worried about missing it.
--------------------------------
The 2nd workshop I went to was on Outreach Programs (I forget the actual title). I'm not currently on the outreach committee, but I though there would be some good ideas to that I could share, and there were. I was most interested in the one about attracting people in their 20s and 30s to join.
--stop calling due "dues" and members "members." Call them "support" and "partners. Don't make belonging to a temple like belonging to a gym or swim club (b/c those are places that hope that you don't really used them once you've joined; we want you to come to shul once you are a member).
--don't just provide social opportunities for young people to get involved; do something that includes a service opportunity and community support
--have reduced or no dues for the first year and reduced up to a certain age, but try to instill in them the value of supporting the temple financially so that when they can, they will.*
--do a program where you provide free or reduced membership for the first 6 months; get people in the door so they can see what goes on
--do new member classes (such as who are the committees, the board, the administrator, etc.) along with mixers where new members can meet current members
--make sure you do a new member survey after the first year; find out what worked for them, what didn't
--make it a priority that the rabbi and president contact each new member/family at least once over the course of the first year.
I have more notes at home, so I'll add to this later. But I felt like this gave me a lot of ideas about outreach.
*I think it is a common misperception that young people don't understand the value of supporting their temple financially; for a lot of people my age (20s–30s) I think they realize that they would be doing something good and valuable, but when you don't make a lot of money you have to make sacrifices and choices as to what you can support, and for many it probably comes down to being able to pay bills or joining a temple. I can say for certain that despite having a decent paying job it is still a bit of a struggle to pay my dues each year, especially as I am trying to save money at the same time for the future.
Biennial, Day 1 (personal observations)
I really do need to update more often... once a year doesn't really cut it. Since I've begun keeping a paper journal again, I'll try and relay some of my more public-friendly thoughts here.
----------------------
Most importantly, at the moment, is that I attended the URJ Biennial last week in San Diego. It was an amazing time, filled with lots of learning, praying, singing, and socializing with fellow Reform Jews. I'm not sure I can even begin to describe how I felt there, but I'll try.
My rabbi and I left Wednesday morning, flying out of Columbus. Being someone who hates flying, I did not sleep well the night before and was up at 3:30AM for a total of about 2 hours of sleep. This would prove to be a not great thing later in the day once we were finally in San Diego. There were a lot of people from the surrounding Columbus, Cincinnati, and Dayton areas on our flight; in fact it felt like the flight was about 75% Jews going to the Biennial! There was an air of excitement and anticipation on the plane and when we landed I couldn't wait to get to the convention center to check in. After settling into my room and changing clothes, I met my rabbi to walk over and sign in at the registration desk. The walk would be my first experience into the strange reality of the Biennial where everyone seems to know everyone else. We stopped so many times so that my rabbi could give people hugs and say hello and catch up in general; I was beginning to think I was with the most popular rabbi around!
Once we finally got into the convention center and got our credentials and schedules my rabbi basically said "see ya later" and I was on my own. Which is the point at which I began to freak out. See, I'm not good with situations where I don't know people and have to introduce myself and all of that. I kind of suck at being social in large groups. I was late for my first workshop because of registration and my 2nd workshops was running late, probably because everyone else was just arriving. No one talked to me in either of the first 2 sessions. I have to admit that my exhaustion and being in a new place with a ton of people I didn't know completely overwhelmed me. I stepped into the bathroom and cried. I wanted nothing more than to go home at that point and I felt like I was approximately 5 years old. But, I washed my face and headed to the exhibit hall where I (thankfully) ran into my rabbi, who asked me if I wanted to join him and his friends for dinner. I didn't hesitate in my acceptance, glad to know I wouldn't be alone for the meal.
I walked around a little more and then went to change for dinner. I wish, now, that I had instead stayed for Ma'ariv, but I think at that point I needed to exit the large, public area for a few minutes in case I began crying again. So, I met the rabbi and his friends for dinner, which was nice and loud due to the children, and I was able to kind of just sit there and listen for the most part. I was so tired by then that I wasn't even hungry anymore, despite not really eating much all day. I was just happy to not be alone, and honestly I like my rabbi and we have a good friendship, so hanging out was comforting. On the way back to the convention center, though, I admitted to feeling like a fish out of water. He reminded me that we'd talked about how there wouldn't be a lot of people my age at the Biennial, which is fair, but at that point I wouldn't have cared if people were 30, 40 or 50 years older than me; I just didn't want to feel like fading into the background. We separated once we were back inside, me to go to the opening address, him to head off to something else, but before we parted he said to call him if I needed anything. I didn't want him to feel like he needed to take care of me and don't him has much, but he said he didn't mind because he worries about me.
I went to the opening addresses and couldn't sit still or stay awake, so I went back to the hotel and collapsed into bed, but not before chatting with my roommate (another congregant there for the WRJ part of the Biennial) and planning to get together with the other 2 women from my temple the next day.
Lessons I learned, on a personal level, from my first day at the Biennial:
1. Getting sleep is vitally important.
2. Eating regular meals is probably nearly as important.
3. My rabbi is, at the very core, a good man.
4. My shyness and any social anxiety is severely heightened when I am tired.
I'll post more about actual content of the Biennial, but I'll try to keep posts like this one separate from content for anyone not wishing to read about my craziness.
----------------------
Most importantly, at the moment, is that I attended the URJ Biennial last week in San Diego. It was an amazing time, filled with lots of learning, praying, singing, and socializing with fellow Reform Jews. I'm not sure I can even begin to describe how I felt there, but I'll try.
My rabbi and I left Wednesday morning, flying out of Columbus. Being someone who hates flying, I did not sleep well the night before and was up at 3:30AM for a total of about 2 hours of sleep. This would prove to be a not great thing later in the day once we were finally in San Diego. There were a lot of people from the surrounding Columbus, Cincinnati, and Dayton areas on our flight; in fact it felt like the flight was about 75% Jews going to the Biennial! There was an air of excitement and anticipation on the plane and when we landed I couldn't wait to get to the convention center to check in. After settling into my room and changing clothes, I met my rabbi to walk over and sign in at the registration desk. The walk would be my first experience into the strange reality of the Biennial where everyone seems to know everyone else. We stopped so many times so that my rabbi could give people hugs and say hello and catch up in general; I was beginning to think I was with the most popular rabbi around!
Once we finally got into the convention center and got our credentials and schedules my rabbi basically said "see ya later" and I was on my own. Which is the point at which I began to freak out. See, I'm not good with situations where I don't know people and have to introduce myself and all of that. I kind of suck at being social in large groups. I was late for my first workshop because of registration and my 2nd workshops was running late, probably because everyone else was just arriving. No one talked to me in either of the first 2 sessions. I have to admit that my exhaustion and being in a new place with a ton of people I didn't know completely overwhelmed me. I stepped into the bathroom and cried. I wanted nothing more than to go home at that point and I felt like I was approximately 5 years old. But, I washed my face and headed to the exhibit hall where I (thankfully) ran into my rabbi, who asked me if I wanted to join him and his friends for dinner. I didn't hesitate in my acceptance, glad to know I wouldn't be alone for the meal.
I walked around a little more and then went to change for dinner. I wish, now, that I had instead stayed for Ma'ariv, but I think at that point I needed to exit the large, public area for a few minutes in case I began crying again. So, I met the rabbi and his friends for dinner, which was nice and loud due to the children, and I was able to kind of just sit there and listen for the most part. I was so tired by then that I wasn't even hungry anymore, despite not really eating much all day. I was just happy to not be alone, and honestly I like my rabbi and we have a good friendship, so hanging out was comforting. On the way back to the convention center, though, I admitted to feeling like a fish out of water. He reminded me that we'd talked about how there wouldn't be a lot of people my age at the Biennial, which is fair, but at that point I wouldn't have cared if people were 30, 40 or 50 years older than me; I just didn't want to feel like fading into the background. We separated once we were back inside, me to go to the opening address, him to head off to something else, but before we parted he said to call him if I needed anything. I didn't want him to feel like he needed to take care of me and don't him has much, but he said he didn't mind because he worries about me.
I went to the opening addresses and couldn't sit still or stay awake, so I went back to the hotel and collapsed into bed, but not before chatting with my roommate (another congregant there for the WRJ part of the Biennial) and planning to get together with the other 2 women from my temple the next day.
Lessons I learned, on a personal level, from my first day at the Biennial:
1. Getting sleep is vitally important.
2. Eating regular meals is probably nearly as important.
3. My rabbi is, at the very core, a good man.
4. My shyness and any social anxiety is severely heightened when I am tired.
I'll post more about actual content of the Biennial, but I'll try to keep posts like this one separate from content for anyone not wishing to read about my craziness.
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